Maraming bagay akong gustong sabihin sa dad ko. At marami ring dahilan kung bakit hindi ko na nasabi, at hindi ko na masasabi pa sa kanya ng harapan. I guess that’s life. Pag ready ka na, huli na. Bad trip di ba? Anyway, below is supposed to be the things I wanted to tell my dad. Siguro hindi na niya mababasa. Pero gusto ko pa rin isulat para kahit papano, nasabi ko sa kanya.
To my Dad,
Hi! I’m not sure how to start with this letter, but I’m pretty sure what I wanted to say: I’m sorry.
Being your son was the best thing I can hold on to. You were a great father not just because you supported me. But because you gave me life. Not because of the material things you gave, but because of the lessons in life you told me. I knew you were there for me when the world won’t stay. We may not have the happiest family, but still I know, you where happy.
But what did I do to repay you for everything? I was not the son you wanted me to be. I was not the son you expected. And I’m sorry. I guess I’m a little bit too late. 6 years to be exact since 5 won’t do. I shunned you out when I should have kept you in. I guess I just can’t bear faking anything. I shunned you out not because I hate you. I just don’t know who you are back then. You were gone a long time.
But I believe I came to my senses just in the nick of time. I changed. I became more and more the son you wanted to have for such as long time. We bonded, went out, watched movies, I started letting you in. But still, it was too late.
I’m sorry I wasn’t the son you expected. I never wanted it to be that way. I just couldn’t bear faking the feelings I have. I was and still am proud you are my dad. I may not be able to say it to you, but have always been proud. I love you dad, not just because you gave me life, but because you were a father to me even though I was not a great son to you.
I’m sorry you had a hard time dealing with me, and thank you for not giving up on me. I couldn’t bear looking at you feeling sad so instead of trying to make you happy, I didn’t. I looked the other way instead. I’m Sorry.
I would also like to thank you for all the lessons in life you gave me through the story of your life when I was hospitalized. You were always there for me, always making me feel good. Thank you.
I guess these are the only things I could say right now: I’m Sorry and Thank You. I really don’t know what to do. The only thing I can do right now to repay you for everything is be a good son, and to make you proud.
This is not goodbye, dad. I know we’ll see each other again. And I hope by that time, you have already forgiven me. Thank You. For everything
Well that’s it. My letter to my dad. Til next time!